A T1D Christmas Memory

I used to get so excited about Christmas I’d make myself sick. Really. Well, here’s my T1D Christmas Memory – hope it makes you smile.

I remember, how my sister Shannon and I would be on a quest to find the Christmas presents mom and dad had hidden, and how we’d nibble the corners of their wrapping to get a glimpse inside if we weren’t able to figure out what they were just by rattling the boxes.  I remember sitting sit idle under the Christmas tree, squinting my eyes at the lights until they danced in front of me. There was just something about the lights, and the smells of Christmas.

I remember mom in the kitchen, crafting her peppermint cookies (cookies that later became outlawed when I became diabetic because they were the melt-in-your-mouth, icing sugar kind – my favorite).  I remember how the freezer would be packed full of Christmas cookie containers and how I’d snatch a few bites here and there thinking she’d never notice… and the box of Dad’s chocolates beside his chair (and how I’d also steal a few of those too). My love of food started at an early age I think!

Holiday Excitement

The holiday excitement would build in the days leading up to Christmas… it was hard to contain it! I loved going to our Sunday School Christmas Concert.  Dad would be finishing up his barn chores while mom, Shannon and I got ready. Mom made sure we had our best dresses on and she’d curl our hair; we felt like movie stars (especially when she gave us a spritz of her fancy perfume.)

I also remember my first Christmas concert as a Diabetic too… A T1D Christmas Memory!

I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes in August 1986.  I was 7 years old. As an adult, I now look back on those days and my heart is overwhelmed with how tough it must have been for my parents.  In those days insulin pumps and blood sugar sensors were only dreams. I was taking 2 injections a day at specific times.  Instead of taking insulin for what I ate, I ate for what I took.  It was a lot different then. My portions and diet were very regulated and we felt like Diabetes ruled our lives.

Sunday School Christmas Concert

It was a snowy winter night in ’86; a perfect night for our Sunday School Christmas Concert! That night, dad was finishing up the farm chores while mom took turns helping my sister and I get ready. Any parent knows the challenge of getting oneself ready while also trying to get the kids presentable. While one girl gets dressed, the other plays Barbie, while one girl gets her hair done… the other sits in the tub. Oh ya, mom and dad still need to get ready too!

So there stood my mom, curling iron in one hand, a brush in the other amid the chaos.  Shannon was playing in the tub with her toes (yes, she had a strange fascination with her toes) while mom quietly converted me into a little princess.  I was wearing a beautiful red dress with a nice big bow, and I was especially proud because mom had found red bows for my hair to match! That night I was both nervous and excited to do a reading at the concert.  I’d practiced for weeks!  Here we were, only an hour to go and I would be center stage.

It all goes to a blur…

We’d had dinner, the table was still covered with dishes and Dad would soon be in from the barn, wondering what he was supposed to wear (yes, believe it or not, he relied on my mother to dress him too!)… and there was my mom, still un-showered, her church dress strewn across the bed… she couldn’t find her nylons, and there she was taking immaculate pride in turning me into her little Christmas Princess.  I remember standing there, excited… so excited… then that’s when it all goes to a blur…

“Laura. Laura are you ok?”

“Larry, help!”

“Mom, did Laura fart?”

“Laura, here. Eat this!!”

I remember the tears on my mom’s cheeks as she held me and sobbed. Dad, a normally strong unemotional man, stood beside us with a can of Coke, his tired cheeks white like the snow that was now covering the lane, while my little sister giggled, “Laura farted! Laura farted! Laura farted!”.

A Taste of T1D for Christmas

For Christmas that year, my family got a taste of Diabetic life. This was the first low blood sugar (hypoglycemia) we ever experienced.

As I write, I think back to that night, and realize the thoughts that were probably going through my parents heads. Here I was, a seven year old girl, who was supposed to have a full happy life ahead… but would I?  If they could only have gotten a glimpse of me today, nearly 29 years later… If only they could know it would be ok. But, they didn’t.

Stress, Excitement and T1D –  oh my

Instead, mom and I stayed home from that Christmas concert.  Dad took Shannon by the hand, popped her in our Thunder Bird, and the two of them went off to Church, probably wishing they could stay home too.  Mom had made Dad’s favorite Shortbread Cookies for the post-concert gathering, but none of that mattered. She was as shook up as I felt. My head was aching and I was very weak. Even though I had eaten my regular dinner, the excitement and nerves caused my blood sugar to drop quickly.  Generally, stress causes blood sugars to rise, but for me, stress and excitement cause my blood sugars to drop, as we would realize throughout the years.

And yes, I farted!  I was a very proper little girl who rarely spoke unless spoken to. In addition, I wasn’t crazy or rebellious either! In later years mom laughs as she remembers that night and recounts, “I knew something was wrong when I was curling your hair and suddenly you let one rip – that just wasn’t YOU!!”

Symptoms of Hypoglycemia

When a Diabetic has a low blood sugar, they may do or say things that aren’t typical.  Sometimes, a low blood sugar can be compared to being intoxicated. Symptoms may include shakiness, nervousness or anxiety, sweating, chills and clamminess, irritability, confusion, dizziness, hunger and nausea, blurred vision, tingling or numbness in the lips/tongue, headaches, weakness, lack of coordination and more.

Today, I’m a 35 years young and I look at the holiday season with so much gratitude, memories and hope.  I don’t know what my next 35 years will bring but I can assure you, I have a great foundation.  From early on, my parents helped me learn about my Diabetes and how to manage it so it didn’t manage me. They instilled in me the value of my health. As a family, we went through some very tough Diabetic years BUT those years positioned me to learn a lot – for example, I now know that when I’m excited or nervous I need to test my blood sugar more frequently or adjust my insulin dose. Today, I use my life experiences and knowledge to help other Diabetics live happy, healthy lives too. It’s a beautiful thing.

AND, I laugh thinking this particular life lesson all started with a little (ok, not so little) Christmas fart!

What’s your T1D Christmas Memory?